1. When it literally appeared as though Kelly had Tourette’s regarding whether Bethenny was a cook or a chef. Clearly one of her friends had made some joke to her about Bethenny being a pretend chef, and her childlike mind had seized upon the idea. But she didn’t know what she was talking about, she just kept repeating the same dumb thing over and over. “Most chefs don’t chop”? What? It was terrifying. And it was only the tip of the iceberg.
2. When she looked at the bag Bethenny got her like it was a bomb. And then it made her cry because she said “it was so impersonal,” but really because she’s supposed to be the Nice One and why didn’t she think of this? Which is why, straightaway the next morning, she declared that as a gift to everyone, she wanted to take pictures of everyone in their bikinis on the beach, which is a more “personal” offering to Bethenny’s present, sure, but also less thoughtful, because they have pictures of themselves on the beach — they are on television.
3. Also, during the crying scene we can see her vagina.
4. When Ramona sort of politely asks Kelly (who is having a conversation on speaker phone) to go into the other room to talk on the phone, Kelly says, “Honestly, this isn’t about you.” Even though this is Ramona’s vacation, it’s pretty clear she’s becoming aware that Kelly’s right.
5. When she was outraged at Bethenny for going on a relaxing vacation after her dad died.
6. When Bethenny did a Jack Nicholson impression, Kelly went, “Oh, my God, Al Sharpton! Al Sharpton!” (This was the point when the girls were starting to actually look scared for her.)
7. “What about when you attacked my friend Gwyneth?” she asked Bethenny. “Gwyneth who?” Bethenny asked. Kelly, appalled, replied: “Paltrow??”
8. When she repeatedly professed to having nightmares about Bethenny stabbing her. “There’s like knives on her tongue,” she said to Jill. “I can’t even imagine Jason kissing her because she’s full of knives.”
9. When she told Alex she has a lot of anger inside, and said “I had nightmares Bethenny was trying to kill me because she’s tried to kill me so many times before.”
10. “Satchels of gold.”